“I’m fixin’ to get into some trouble. You comin’?” the meme says. When the heart aches, sometimes there is the temptation to escape it all and bring company along with. Get into some kind of trouble while having fun. Anything is better than this pain. Truly, my heart is aching, but I am not aiming to get into trouble. I love my Lord and Savior Jesus too much to go that route. Ready to have happy times again. It had been 4 weeks since Dean and I’s mental and body rejuvenating vacation to the southeast coast. A baby shower for a beloved niece brought some joy, and for Dean guy time at the shooting range with his brothers, sons, and father this past weekend. My heart still aches for the loved ones whose mental illness leads them astray. My heart aches to witness painful steps, one after the other of a faithful mother. My heart aches to see poverty rob a person from becoming all they can. Do you see and feel that kind of heart ache, too?
Then there is loneliness sometimes even in the midst of all the family and work obligations. I have done this thing called family life for so many years. Not always a good wife, mother, daughter. But tried to make family my priority. To be honest, family and friends fall short like I do. We are human, and all need Jesus. Go down memory lane, I realize decisions I would have made differently as a young adult, wife, mother, grandmother, adult child, employee, and neighbor. “You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending,” wrote C.S. Lewis.
Jesus, heal my aching heart. Comfort those who my heart aches for. Bring them through another day. Let them know Your love. God, show me what You want me to spend time on today, in this winter season of my life. I may be getting older, but I am still willing to do Your will. Good works do not replace home life. Family and friends do not replace Jesus. Jesus. We need You.
The recently deceased country singer Toby Keith presented this song before his passing. Words so eloquent…
Don’t let the old man in
I wanna leave this alone
Can’t leave it up to him
He’s knocking on my doorAnd I knew all of my life
That someday it would end
Get up and go outside
Don’t let the old man inMany moons I have lived
My body’s weathered and worn
Ask yourself how would you be
If you didn’t know the day you were bornTry to love on your wife
And stay close to your friends
Toast each sundown with wine
Don’t let the old man inMany moons I have lived
My body’s weathered and worn
Ask yourself how would you be
If you didn’t know the day you were bornWhen he rides up on his horse
And you feel that cold bitter wind
Look out your window and smile
Don’t let the old man inLook out your window and smile
Don’t let the old man in





















